Wonderfully and Beautifully Made.

The world is an ugly place. And no one can convince me otherwise. There may be beauty in it here and there... But the beauty is hidden behind the grey cloud that has been accumulating over the years that continues the blanket society.

The world is ugly. But I am convinced that it can be beautiful again... I have to believe that. I do believe that. And I hold on to it every day from the moment I get up, to the moment I go back to bed. Day in and day out. I hold on to it every time I look on Facebook and see all the posts full of depression and hate that make my heart sink. I hold on to it now, and I will hold on to it forever.

I may not be alive when the change that needs to happen finally comes to pass.. But it will happen. And I will be a part of that change, however small. 

The world has become a place where Christians are no longer Christ like, religion and law have melted together, freedom is not really free, and people claim that hate is love.

You only have to look toward one issue to see that this is all true... And that is the topic of same sex marriage. 

Every day I see people who claim to be Christ's example spread hate and discrimination towards these people, often under the ruse that it is "out of love". I see the LGBT community getting so frustrated and hurt that they eventually lash out with hate as well. I see hearts being crushed because once again they were denied the happiness that marriage can bring, a right that everyone should be able to have. I see families turning their backs on a sibling, a child, an aunt, an uncle, because that person could no longer live a lie and people fear what they do not understand. 

Every day I see a war. A war between God's creations that he most loves. And I can't help but think that every day we are breaking our creators heart. And to think about that it breaks my heart. 

It is said that we are all wonderfully and beautifully made in God's own image, and we are all one in the same, carrying a piece of our amazing creator inside of us. 

It is also said that God loves each and every one of us unconditionally and equally. That he created us exactly how he intended for us to be, with absolutely no flaws in His eyes. 

So why is it that we feel we can just veto His will, and pick at people, and tell them what is wrong about them and why? Since when did we as human beings receive that right? Since when were we told that we should turn our backs on others because they believe differently, or love differently, or think differently? Since when were we told that we should shove our beliefs in other people's faces, and tell them that if they didn't believe it they would be going to Hell? Since when did God decide that He would keep families and loved ones apart if they didn't join a specific man made religion? Since when?

I refuse to believe that a beautiful and merciful God would ever so harshly punish one of His creations that He loves so dearly, simply for being the way that He created them. 

I do not believe that you will go to Hell if you are gay. I do not believe that being gay is in anyway a sin. And I do not believe that a basic human right, such as marriage, should ever be kept from you because you are gay. 

Being gay is beautiful. So is being straight. And so is being transsexual. And do you want to know why? Because you are wonderfully and beautifully made in God's image. You were born the way you are, and no human being should ever be able to tell you that being yourself is in any way wrong.  

Anyone who tells you that you are sinning or you are doing something wrong because you're gay, because their religion said so, is never doing it "out of love". They are doing it because they fear what they do not understand. If you are ever wanting to change someone, change what they want, think, or feel.. You do not love them. Love is a total and complete acceptance for who they are in every way, and supporting them in it. 

Do you think God, who loves you completely, is sitting there going "oh, he/she needs to change this about themselves.. Otherwise I cannot fully accept them.". No. He is not. Because in his eyes, you are perfect... Because he made you that way.

Do not preach complete love and free agency if you do not follow it yourself. Do not claim to be an example of Christ if what you are doing is the exact opposite of what he would do if he was here. 

We are all one in the same... And I pray that one day it won't matter what your sexual orientation is, what language you speak, what religion you belong to, what gender you are, or what the color of your skin is... I pray that eventually there will really be total love and acceptance.. And not just false idea's of it.

Until then I will stick to the very wise word's of John Lennon:

"Imagine there's no Heaven.. It's easy if you try. No Hell below us, above us only sky. Imagine all the people livin' for today. Imagine there's no countries, it isn't hard to do. Nothing to kill or die for, and no religion too. Imagine all the people livin' life in peace.. You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. I hope someday you will join us, and the world will be as one.."

Until then.. I will keep on dreaming. And hoping..

I'm Amazed By You

Now days everyone is so quick to tell you that love never comes like it does in the books, or in the movies. They will tell you that it just isn't possible, that it is just wishful thinking, or that those are just fairy-tales...

No one looks for that whirl wind love any more.. That feeling that just sweeps you off your feet and sends a million little butterflies whirling around in your stomach.. That feeling that always has you tongue tied, giving you goofy random smiles, or makes your heart squeeze and skip a beat.

No one looks for it, simply because they have been told that it doesn't exist.. So people settle. They settle for the mediocre. They may find love, but not that amazing love, that always sweeps you off your feet every day. That love that is end all and be all. That love that feels your chest, and lifts you off the ground until you're flying and soaring through the sky.

No one believes in it anymore. 

No one, except me.

Because amazingly I have found it. I am one of the lucky ones that have been completely swept off their feet with no intention of getting back up.

My love is nothing short of a fairy-tale.

For so long I have been closed off to love, pushing people away, afraid to feel something for them... But always craving it, always feeling that something is missing... But never willing to risk it, because I was always so scared of getting hurt. I always settled for mediocre because I was told I would never find anything more.

Until you.

You have opened my eyes, breathed life into me, and I never intend to let you go.

You accept me for all I am, and all I have yet to become. You support me in ways no one else does. You laugh with me at the stupidest things. I never have to be afraid to be my complete self around you. And the craziest part of all, is that it came so easy.. My love for you. 

You are like a hurricane.... You broke me down... Yet made me so much better. My walls aren't up anymore. They no longer exist. I never knew how much I was missing out on until you were able to show me.

You've have shown me nothing but patience, and acceptance. You have stuck with me through all of my break downs, and insecurities, never blinking or backing down.. Only standing there calmly in the middle of the storm, promising me that you'd always be there to catch me and be my anchor.

I am vulnerable. And I have never been vulnerable before.. Not really.. I have completely opened up to you and it has been the best decision I have ever made.

I am amazed by you.. And I love you completely.

I will always be here for you.. Like you have been there for me. I will always be trying to show you the complete love you have shown me since day one.

You show me how I should experience life.. Wide eyed and in awe.. 

Bad things will always be happening in this world. Wars will be waged. Hearts will be broken. People will die. Houses will burn down. Friendships will be ruined. But one thing will always remain.. And that is love.

I don't care how cheesy it may sound. I don't care if people scoff at it. 

A fairy-tale romance is not impossible. It never was. People just overlook it, because without realizing they have their walls up, afraid to be completely vulnerable in such a beautiful. 

You are worth the risk.

You're nothing I expected.. Yet everything I wanted all at once. 

You will forever be the one who helped me start to write the pages in my fairy-tale. 

You have left your mark on my heart.

You're my piece of infinity.

Crucifixions

How can I put this? 

Except for saying that every day we go through in this life... We are crucified. 

Not in the literal sense... Obviously. But metaphorically. 

We do not go through one day where there isn't something out there that hurts us in some way. 

It may be you that hurts you. Or perhaps a family member, an employer, a teacher, a friend, a colleague, a total stranger... Or anyone, or anything else.

Something will always be there to hurt us. To throw us to the dogs. To crucify us.

Maybe you are the type of person who beats themselves up emotionally. Maybe you are constantly telling yourself that you aren't pretty enough. Or that you're stupid for getting that answer wrong. Or that you aren't a good enough friend. Or that you aren't popular enough. 

Maybe work has been really hard lately and you haven't been seeming to perform at those impossible standards that your boss sets for you.. And you are constantly being told that you aren't doing good enough. You have been told you cold be let go any time.

Maybe your friends are the type of people that always take, but never give. Or they are always stabbing you in the back. Or perhaps they are both. And you just keep telling yourself that maybe if you were a better friend, or a better person, you wouldn't be having these problems with them. Or maybe all of their crap is finally just getting to you, but you don't have the courage to cut yourself off from them..

Whatever your situation is, whatever type of life you are living, you are always dealing with something hard every day.

Something or someone is always pounding those nails into your body... Or throwing you into a dark tomb and covering the exit with a stone. 

Even the strongest and most confident person out there will occasionally let things get to them. We are after all only human, it is impossible to always have it together, 100% of the time. 

So the question isn't why you are letting these things get to you.. But instead... How long to you want to allow yourself to feel like this?

How long do you want to stay in that tomb? Yes there may be a boulder covering it... But guess what? You have the power to move it, whenever you want.

Just as someone, or perhaps your ego mind, moved that boulder to cover the exit, you can move it and open the exit.

Believe it or not, you can always shorten, or totally eliminate, the amount of time that you experience emotional pain or distress.

How long to you want to feel that anxiety? How long to you want to allow yourself to be depressed because of a mistake at work? How long are you going to talk down to yourself? 

YOU

You are the key.

How long are YOU going to allow this to happen?